While parenting is rarely easy, for divorced couples in Louisiana it can seem like a constant uphill battle. Both parents must be able to come to terms on child-rearing topics, both for their own sanity and for the benefit of their children. If you find your ex being difficult when it comes to co-parenting, Medium offers the following advice.

No matter what led to the demise of the marriage, parents must treat other civilly. This is especially important when kids are around, as they are likely to take nasty things said about the other parent to heart. If you believe your ex is speaking ill of you to your children, it is time to have a frank discussion. Highlight the damage this can do and explain that you only want what is best for your family. You can also agree to stick to child-rearing topics only, and limit conversation to texting or emailing.

Of course, your disagreements may extend to childcare as well. Your former spouse may believe he or she has the better outlook when it comes to parenting, whether it involves schooling, medical care, or extracurricular activities. If you share custody, reiterate the importance of both parents playing an active role in their kids’ lives, particularly when it comes to important decisions. You may also want to contact your attorney if you feel your authority as a parent is being undermined.

Your former spouse may also blame you for things that are outside of your control. This blame could stem from a genuine belief of wrongdoing or it could be predicated on resentment about the end of your marriage. Instead of taking the bait, try to figure out what you can do to come to a compromise. Remember, both parents must be flexible when it comes to caring for their kids.