Can sharing a common goal ease divorce?

Divorces can be contentious affairs, with each spouse hiring the best attorney they can find and battling it out over everything from spousal support to who gets the marital home. But drawing out a divorce contest may not benefit both spouses in the long run, and if they have children, a harsh conflict could cause more emotional stress. This is why even if both spouses disagree on most issues, agreeing to a common goal may ease the divorce and get it over with more quickly.

Forbes Magazine explains that to ease tension with your spouse, you can try to maintain respect for your soon to be ex. Some people find this a tough exercise since their other spouse may have wronged them, perhaps through infidelity or unethical behavior. Despite such issues, some couples can put their feelings aside and treat their spouse with civility, which can open the doors to better communication as the spouses try to agree to a common goal for their divorce.

Coming up with a common goal does not mean spouses have to start resolving their individual disagreements with each other. It does mean that both spouses recognize a mutual priority to work towards. Some couples have children and want them to benefit as much as possible, so they make benefiting their children their priority goal. Having this common goal may help focus a couple as they work out their divorce.

Some couples fear they cannot maintain their quality of living after the divorce. Such worries may lead to contentious divorce fights over assets. But instead of contesting for every dollar they can get, spouses could agree that each of them should come out of the divorce with financial equity. It may mean sharing more of the assets than each spouse had intended, but it can dial down emotional stress and help a couple feel better about coming out of the marriage with enough money to start over.

Couples do not have to come together over material goals. They may simply want to get through a divorce without emotionally hurting one another and will approach every problem with civility and a willingness to listen to the other side. If spouses do decide to join together over common objectives, they should also inform their attorneys about their goals to help ensure the process goes as smoothly as possible.